2nd day of Acceptance

I know, I look so crazy now, 'coz I am having this countdown to myself.. though, I am having fun.. really! hahaha! I went to MCDO awhile ago to meet Mara and my other friends, while waiting! guess what sounds is playing around! it's the second song that I've heard he sang since we've met.. today is the second day and the second song.. hay.. I don't know why I am acting like this.. I know that I have accepted already that we can't be together like the way I wanted to. it's so hard, yeah! but there's no other way to do it! maybe, and I guess, it is because I am not yet totally healed that's why I am acting like this. boo hoo hoo..

My two words.. I'm done!

After everything i have done for you.I accepted everything Still love you, yet you never try looking at it.and now, it's over. My heart voluntarily quit.
Finally, i have realized that I don't deserve this.
Honestly, you don't deserve me. yeah! I still love you and I probably will for a long time.
But, I can't stay here anymore,I would always say that I'm okay, but there is such a word "PRETEND". it hurts too much.I guess, this is MOVING on. I guess i am tired of being the last thing on your mind. I should have known from the start. To me, you are the reason why I am hurting and yet, you are the reason why I am still loving. but to you, I am just your friend and maybe just a sister. you hurt me more than I deserve, how can you be so cruel? I love you more than you deserve.Why am I such a fool? am I really a fool? I always stick to what other people say that when you love someone,you don't know the word "FOOL"
Little did I know, that you were just a dead end mad.
Now, I believe it when people say that love is blind. I must have been blind to love a person like you.it finally hit me when you knew that I will be stepping next, concur and did not stop me! maybe, if I had just looked from you that first night, everything would be different
and my heart wouldn't be breaking. I actually want to do what you did to me.
lead you on..
make you fall for me..
then just let you go EFFORTLESSLY.
sometimes, I am hating myself for everything i have felt for you. I even wish I could go back and erase the day I met you.. but then, I'll never regret loving you. You've made me stronger by breaking my heart. I made a mistake, thinking you were my world. you won't get away with this. Thank you for ripping my heart out. this does not make me bitter about love, but rather makes me realize that if I wanted so much to be with the wrong person, how great will it be when the right one comes along. there is no medication for this illness. no known cure other TIME. maybe in some time, I'll get back my heart.. maybe in sometime, I'll get back my pride. and maybe somewhere down the road, I'll forget to remember you. hopefully one day, you will seek love and be sorry that you threw mine away. and one day you'll realize, you could have been with me. I hope someday, you'll realize what a fool you were to let someone like me slip from your grip. and see that the one you've been looking for was the one who set you free. One day, I will be able to look you in the eye without feeling the pain. One day, I will be able to stand next to you without wanting to hold your hand. one day, I'll get over you and talk to you like nothing went wrong.


likewise, thanks for the FRIENDSHIP. :)

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Its Sunday night... whoops! Wait! No! It’s Monday already! Still working with my research paper...  aaacckk!!! I hate this feeling that I have right now… it’s really hard working with a certain thing if you’re carrying something really, and much heavy inside.. It’s my 2nd day working with mom... I hate her to be my boss... I want to pull the day to sat. To finish my 1 week “contract” as a substitute for her assistant. *sigh “...tell me why, why, why, why, why. Can you help me…”  naduduling na ko kaka-encode ng shipment advice sa cargo shipping line online... I watched IMYLC yesterday! What a surprised! May humabol pa! hay! Actually, di ko naramdaman yung movie.. Maybe because, I can’t relate myself to it... And I am thinking of my unfinished task.. huweeehhh? Argh! Non-stop na naman ang incoming calls sa telephone.. aacckk!!! I want to sleep now.. I am tuned in to Wave89.1 I love the quiet storm program.. super it always makes me cry.. I had a mistake.. Iris asked me what will be the OST if I will have a movie and a story of my life… sana sinagot ko na lang “so many questions” by Side A anyway, I have to end this here already.. ‘coz I still have to finished my job on document 1..



XOXO,
Pia Gonzales